Mesmerized

I just learned about Miguel Migs.  Here is Mesmerized.

Of course my WAY TOO COOL friend Elizabeth already knew about him and has his Cd.

No matter what I do, I can’t keep up with that Elizabeth!

But that is just what makes her cool, and just what I like about her!

So, Elizabeth, if you are reading, this one goes out to you!

Chixdiggit

Here is a video I like from a band I just discovered.  They are called Chixdiggit and this song is Spanish Fever.  Get ready to bounce around your living room!

 The temperatures increased again in Baltimore and we have had a hot couple of days.

The good news is that Labor Day is just around the corner!  Three day weekend! And I might take Friday off and have a four day weekend!   No plans, really.  Just four days to relax and recouperate.

Not much is happening here at the Dartboard.

More tomorrow!

What the….

 I am just about at the end of the Deathly Hallows.

 All I can say it….. WTF?

I am really confused.

I am not really sure what is going on or even what is happening.

It seems like a bad case of “Who’s got the elder wand!” (without giving anything away)

If anyone would like to email me with their thoughts on book 7, please do.    I don’t want to post spoilers for those that have not read the book.  

I think I will go back to crime fiction now.

Everything seems to work out in crime fiction.

Shake that…

Here is a little video by Groove Armada that will get you in the mood.  It is a song that gets trapped inside my head and won’t let me go.   Maybe it will get trapped in yours.

I had a nightmare last night.

Someone I worked with was retiring and was having a super seventies retirement party.  I didn’t really know the person but because of the theme I decided to go.  I took a big afro wig out of my desk drawer and put it on.

Then I managed to log on to the net and found a radio station that played disco.    I started playing it at my desk.   Two of my coworkers were not amused.

While I was dancing around in my afro, they got up and went to the managers office.   They told him that they wanted to have me fired.  I tried to explain that I worked better with music playing.   I didn’t want to be fired.

Funny enough, the two coworkers in my dream are my two friends at work and they would never turn me in, even if I was playing disco and dancing around in an afro.   I wonder why I was dreaming these things?

I currently am playing music at my desk.  But it is very soft and mellow.  And the office is almost empty.  So I think I will be ok.  Maybe the disco will come on later!

When Depressed, Book A Cruise!

Thanks for all the kind words.  You guys mean so much to me.  I am going to try and post more often.  I just have been feeling a little bit down.  I know it is going to be a process and I will have to get through this.  And I will get through this.   I am a trouper.

I brought some wonderful summery house music to work with me today and have been playing it at my desk (and torturing my coworkers) .  I also have a new cd called “Fierce Disco” that is really quite fun.  I will play that a bit later.

Chris and I had both taken off the week just behind Thanksgiving this year and we were going to go on a cruise, but we are a little short on cash so we decided against it.   With all this mess with my sister, I decided I really needed the cruise to look forward to.   I will need a week’s vacation, and life is short enough as it is without being able to enjoy it.  So I booked us a week on the Carnival Triumph, leaving from Miami and visiting San Juan,  St. Thomas, and Grand Turk.  I have already booked the flight to Miami so we have to go now, because flights are nonrefundable.   So I am super excited because I love to cruise more than anything.    I even decided on getting a balcony. It is a little bit more, but it is quite worth it in my opinion, as I can sit out there and read in the sun.

This week has been going well.  We have been really busy at work but the week is moving quickly. Tomorrow I meet with my therapist.   We missed out last week appointment as she had something come up and could not meet, so I really need to talk to her this week.    This week I work on Saturday so have Friday off and I am looking forward to that, too, as I will have the day all to myself to just hang around and relax.   I need to do more relaxing. 

And, I bought tickets to Xanadu on Broadway and I go see that at the end of September.   I am super excited about Xanadu.  I loved the movie. I will love the show.

I think Tomorrow, a video.  But you will have to wait until then!

More Bad News

Hi guys.

Just checking in.

My sister had her biopsy done this week.  She went into the hospital and they had to collapse her lung.   Unforunately, the cancer has spread to her lungs.   We are not sure of the treatment yet.  She is only 37.   I am really scared.  I don’t know what will happen. I don’t want her to die.

If she dies, and then my mother dies, I don’t have very many relatives left.  I know I have Chris, but I don’t want to be the sole survivor of my family.  I don’t want to be the one left.

But even if they get the cancer this time, she probably will get it again.   And I am so helpless. I don’t have anything that I can do to help.   I am going to apply for FMLA (family medical leave) so I can take time off if I am needed to take her to appointments or anything else I need to do.

I have been eating non stop all week.  I can’t really stop.  I get upset and I crave carbs.  And ice cream.  And I eat them.  And they don’t make me feel better but for a brief instant they do.    I am trying not to shop away the pain but sometimes that works a little bit.   But then even that wears off and I am left thinking and thinking and thinking.

And it is hard for me to come here and talk.  It is hard for me to think of the words to say.  I read your blogs and realize that life is going on,  moving forward, not stopping.  And I so badly want it to stop.  I want more time.  I want to know what I am supposed to do.  I hate feeling out of control and frightened.   I hate being in this state of flux.

I just want things to be better.

And things just keep getting worse.

at least I now have my therapist. I will see her Wednesday. If I can hold out that long…

Harry Potter

I saw Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix yesterday.

It was awesome!

I love Imelda Staunton and her portrayal of Dolores Umbridge.

That Dolores Umbridge is a piece of work!

The film was shorter than the other films and I did find it a bit rushed at times.  They should have made it a bit longer. There was a lot to cover in that book.    But, like the others it was awesome.   I enjoyed it greatly.

And the theater had AC. Even better.

Hope your weekend is going well!  

Torchwood

Somehow my friend at work has season 1 of Torchwood on a series of CDs you can play on the computer.  Direct from the BBC!

And, this weekend, he has lent the CDs to me!

So, I am in Torchwood heaven!

It is an amazing show.  I am really digging it so far and I have only watched the first four episodes.  And so many more to keep me entertained!

Jealous?

I love you Captain Jack Harkness!

Heatstroke

Hi guys.

Sorry I have not been writing.  The truth is I have been sick and a bit depressed.   But I am getting a little bit better.

The heat has been out of control in Baltimore.  It was 105 degrees yesterday, and I got a terrible headache that lasted for hours.  I was so sick I had to stay home from work.   I can deal with limited amounts of heat, but the heat seems to be increasing in the summer to levels that I just can’t handle.   And when I get too hot I get sluggish and things like blogging fall by the wayside.  I know some people think I should move North (T.Y.) but for now, it is just not possible.   And I am building up a retirement at my current employment and would like to keep it up until I get the chance to really retire.  And most of the time it is not too hot here. Just summer.  And boy is it ever.   If only I had the body for a thong…

My sister seems to be doing OK.   She has not been able to start her chemo… they did a scan of her and found a shadow on her lung which could be nothing but could be lung cancer and if so, they have to treat it a different way.  My mother and sister are convinced it is nothing and that everything will be fine.  The worrywart brother is the one who seems to take everything to heart.    I am really nervous. My sister has a biopsy on Monday and they will discover what it is.  So, sometimes I am upset and sometimes I have trouble sleeping.   And then I am tired and cranky and also don’t feel  like blogging.   Just don’t have the energy. 

But the good news is that I started seeing a therapist.  And I really like her and am going to see her once a week.   And she is really easy to talk to.   And I seem to be much more mixed up than I thought previously.   The only problem in talking to a therapist is you find so many other things that are wrong with you that you then need to work on and fix.   But you never really fix them.  You are just aware of them and you try to act in a different way but you have been doing what you have been doing for so long, it is hard.  You don’t have to tell me I am a worrier.  I know.   Been doing it for years.   Can’t stop now!

Anyway… am looking into joining a support group.  I will keep you posted.   I wonder if a group of Bears at the Eagle will count?  They would certainly cheer me up! 

Anyway… thanks for reading even when I am not posting.  I will try and be better.

Hugs.

D